“I-I agree” she nodded. Maybe this break really was for the best. Then again, knowing that Finn would be seeing other girls made her very uncomfortable. He could easily fall in love with one of them. Well that would just show we aren’t meant to be than Q, she told herself, shrugging. ”I love you too, Finn. I always have and I always will” she said, not wanting him to every forget it. ”And.. Even if we don’t work out in the end, I just want you to still be a part of my life.. Well if that’s okay with you.”
Quinn continued to pack her bags, a weird feeling reoccurring in the pit of her stomach. It was the same nausea from this morning, that she knew. She slapped her hand over her mouth, going into the bathroom, looking the door behind her. She ran the water as she threw up in the toilet, trying to hide the sound. She was sure it was just food poisoning, but even still, she didn’t want Finn to ask any questions. Once she regained composure, she stood up, flushing the toilet, washing her hands and mouth, quickly brushing her teeth. She grabbed all of her toiletries, bringing them to her suitcase. She made sure to act like nothing happened.
Finn nodded, the corners of his lips turning up in a slight smile. “Okay, Quinn. I’ll be part of your life even if we don’t end up together. Only if you’re a part of mine too, got it?” He sat down on the bed as she ran into the bathroom. Finn wasn’t sure where he and Quinn were headed exactly. The future of them seemed so hazy. He heard the vague sounds of seemed to be throwing up, but Finn wasn’t exactly sure what it was. Finn’s best guess was that she was doing her hair or something relating to that.
Once Quinn returned to the room, Finn remained quite silent as she continued to pack up her things. He didn’t want to disrupt her or anything like that. Finn knew that there was something he should do or say to keep her from leaving, but he felt powerless in the situation. He continued to remind himself that this was the right thing—them being separate—don’t worry about it.
Quinn looked up as she heard Finn say her name. She was hopeful with what he may suggest. This is stupid, and we should be together, she waited for the words to come out of his mouth. She was surprised when she heard the exact opposite. We should see other people. Her heart sank, gulping. ”Uh.. Yeah that’s probably best” she nodded, not wanting to disagree with him. Clearly if he was the one suggesting it, it was probably the right decision. ”Yeah.. Yeah you’re right. I-I think that’d be best” she willed herself not to cry. She wouldn’t allow herself to cry over this. She needed to accept that her and Finn were no longer a couple.
“So it’s settled then. We’ll see other people” she took a deep breath and gave him a slight nod. ”I’ll call the front desk about getting my own room” she stood, walking over to the phone, dialing down to the concierge. She should be the one to leave, seeing as it was originally Finn’s room in the first place. It’d only be right. She hung up the phone, turning to look at Finn. ”They said it’ll be ready in an hour.” Gathering her bag, she began packing her belongings. She made sure not to make eye contact with him all the while.
“Yeah…I just think that seeing other people would be best for us. It’s not that I don’t love you…I do, a lot actually. More than anyone has ever loved another person…I just, need some time, you know? To think. Because if and when we do get back together, I want us to be sure that this is what we want. What we imagine ourselves being like. I want to be with you, Quinn. Maybe not now, but sometime in the near future.” Finn peered out of the window, avoiding eye contact with her.
He watched as she went over to call the front desk. Finn really didn’t want her to be alone in a hotel room by herself, but he knew it wasn’t his place to say so otherwise. “O..kay.” He said as she began packing up her belongings. Finn had this feeling in his gut that he should make her stay. She should be with him every night, his arms wrapped around her body, keeping her safe. Maybe this break would be good for them. They could decide if they really wanted to be with each other.
Quinn spent most of her time sick in the bathroom. She didn’t know what was wrong with her, but she assumed it must’ve been some sort of bad food poisoning or something that she ate. It stopped around lunch time, leaving her sitting in the chair by the window, reading her book. She felt more lonely than she’d ever felt. She missed Finn already. She tried so hard to focus on the words on the page, but she couldn’t get Finn out of her mind.
She jumped slightly when she heard the door open, looking to see Finn walk through the door. She wanted so badly to run up to him, hug him and kiss him, and tell him how wrong she was, but she refrained. She had to do what was best for her. Like he did, she just looked back down at her book, ignoring the fact that he’d walked through the door.
Finn closed his eyes, as if he was staring back at his eyelids. He felt himself drifting off to a light sleep. An imagine of an older Quinn appeared in his mind again. Finn had had this dream before. It was their future. Well, the future they might get, if they get back together. Their son and daughter mirrored themselves, with the youngest as the “black sheep” of the family. Finn knew he’d love their youngest daughter just as much as he’d love their two oldest children.
His eyelids batted open not much later after he had drifted off. Finn saw that Quinn was still seated next to the window. Sighing, he got off the bed and walked over to where she was seated. “Look…Quinn, I…think it’s best if we see other people. I will always love you, that I know for sure, it’s just…I don’t know.” Finn took a deep breath before continuing. “Is this what you want?” He rested his hand on her shoulder. “For us to not be together?”
When Finn exited the room, he decided to go see Vegas for himself. He walked along the crowded streets, thinking about Quinn. Finn went to see the fountains at the Bellagio. He heard that they were supposed to be breathtaking. The entire time, Finn couldn’t get one thing out of his head: Quinn. How she should be here with him and how this was supposed to be their day. Their day to hang out, their day to spend with each other, and now it was all ruined.
He made his way back to the hotel after having lunch at McDonald’s. Finn didn’t want to be alone in this city without Quinn, his other half. Finally reaching their floor, Finn walked slowly back to their room. He opened the door cautiously because he half expected Quinn to be gone. That wasn’t the case, however. Finn ignored Quinn’s presence and went to go sit down on the bed. He took his plaid shirt and the shirt underneath it off because it was making him warm. Finn slipped his jeans off, as well as his socks and shoes before lying down.
Quinn frowned as Finn got up, going into the bathroom. What are you doing, Quinn? she asked herself, placing her hands over her face. She wanted to be with Finn, she did, but she felt like she needed time to think. Think about the relationship, think about the future. She hoped that he could understand. She bit on the inside of her cheek nervously, watching for him to return to her from the bathroom. She sniffled again, drying her now red eyes.
“It’s not a break from you, Finn. It’s a break from us” she clarified, speaking quietly. ”I’m not looking for another man.. I just.. I need to think things over.. I love you so much. More than I’ve ever loved anyone. It’s just.. a break. Not breaking up but..” she sighed. ”If you want to see other girls, I’d understand, but I know that I want to be with you in the end. I just need some time to think” she felt like she was repeating herself, and not making any sense.
Finn looked at Quinn in disbelief. “What? A break from us, but not me? Quinn…that doesn’t make any fucking sense.” He sighed, taking a seat on the bed. “Look…I really, really wanna be with you, but if that’s not what you want right now, then I guess I’ll have to accept that.” Finn took a deep breath and looked away from her. “I think I’m going to go…I’ll see you soon, Quinn. Maybe. Doesn’t matter, I guess.”
He got up off the bed and slipped his Nikes on, trying not to look at the motionless figure still seated on the bed. “I’ll see you around.” Finn called to Quinn as he gathered up his phone, wallet, ad room key. He walked briskly towards the elevator, impatiently pushing the button. Once it opened, he sighed in relief at the fact that there was’t anybody else inside. When the door closed behind him, Finn felt a hot tear slipping from his eye.
Quinn sniffled, looking down after he pulled away. She brought her hand to her cheek, wiping the tears from her eyes. No matter how hard she fought, her heart always wanted Finn. Even in high school, she never really got over Finn. Their break ups wrecked her for the rest of high school. It was like she couldn’t live without him. Even now, when she felt as if breaking up would be the best idea, part of her felt as if she couldn’t. Their love was intoxicating.
“Do you think we should take a break…?” she finally whispered, her thoughts clouding her judgement. ”I.. I know I love you more than anything.. but maybe we both need time apart to think about where we want this to go…” she looked into his eyes, waiting for his reaction. She felt as if she needed time to breath for a bit before she committed for the rest of her life.
The words we and break stunned Finn. He thought that Quinn wanted to be in a relationship with him, but I guess he was wrong. Finn didn’t know what to say or do, so he got off the bed and went into the bathroom. What are you doing, Hudson? Give her what she wants. She needs space. She doesn’t want you hovering over her every five seconds. Finn said to himself as he stared in the mirror. He turned on the water and splashed the cool liquid on his face. Maybe this was all a dream and none of this was really happening.
Finn decided it’d be best if he manned up and accepted it. Quinn didn’t want to be with him. As much as it pained him, Finn knew he’d say that he’s willing to go on a break because it would make her happy, and he happiness was all that ever mattered in Finn’s life. He opened up the door to the bathroom, silently retreating over to the bed. “Okay. I’ll give you a break from me. Just let me know if you find another man.” He said bitterly.
For some reason she felt like it was a mistake to break up their relationship when Finn hadn’t even been unfaithful. He hadn’t done anything to prove that he would do that to her again, and he’d only been loving and caring to her. She was letting Puck’s words get the best of her, her own fears trying to become reality. He loves you, Q. Don’t mess this up. She kept her focus down at the ground, her hands placed in her lap as she picked at her thumb nail.
Her heart quickened as he made his way closer to her. She let him take her hand willingly, and felt tears well in her eyes once again as he placed his hand over her heart. She realized what he was doing. Her heart belonged to him, and his to her. Something they’d always professed to each other. She looked into his deep brown eyes as he lifted her chin, seeing the truth that laid behind. She saw the Finn Hudson who she loved and adored ever since she was a mere 16. Once he said those words, she could feel her heart melt. Those words had meant so much to each of them in high school, and now they meant even more. A tear rolled down her cheek, as she nodded slowly, realizing that their love was more important than what anyone had to say about it. She leaned in slowly, pressing a slow and passionate kiss to his lips.
Finn saw a tear slip out of her eyes, rolling down her cheek, and hitting her upper lip as she nodded. He nodded along with her, still looking into her eyes. “O…kay.” Finn whispered before he felt her soft lips on his. They moved together in unison, as if they were made for each other. Finn pulled away shortly, looking into Quinn’s eyes again, searching for any kind of emotion hidden in her green orbs.
He didn’t say anything for a while, enjoying the silence of the room. They were in love more than they ever have been, and Finn wanted it to stay that way. He figured Puck said those things out of jealousy, and also truth. “So…what do you wanna do today, baby? Since…you’re my girlfriend and all.” Finn looked away from her and out the window, getting a view of Vegas in the early morning.
Quinn let out a deep breath, staring out the window, her mind drifting to all the good memories with Finn. Their love was real. She thought to their first date. She thought about the day she told him she was pregnant; the way he held her close in his arms as she sobbed. She thought to when they kissed at the kissing booth, and then again in the theater. Her thoughts finally lead her to the day of Jean Sylvester’s funeral. The day he’d chosen Rachel over her. Even again thinking about it pained her. It felt like she was being stabbed in the heart.
“Time. Maybe that’s what I need.. What we both need. To see what we both really want” Quinn finally spoke up, walking back over to Finn. She sat away from him on the edge of the bed. Her eyes felt sore from crying. She really hoped she was making the right decision. Maybe time was what Finn and her both needed. A break. It didn’t change the way she felt about him, but it would definitely help her get a better perspective on things.
Can we be in love again? Finn remembered Quinn asking him in the hallway. He didn’t understand it then like he does now. He thought it was her asking them to be in love again, when they never really fell out of it. Now, Finn knows what she really meant. She could feel him slipping away and she wanted him back. It was so simple back then, unlike how complicated everything is now. All they had to do back then was be popular and be liked. Now, they have their futures to worry about, their jobs, and their relationships with everyone they had met in high school.
Finn felt the bed sink as Quinn sat down on the bed. There was words that came out of her mouth, but he filtered them out of his mind. He didn’t want to hear them. He didn’t need to. Finn sat up on the bed and scooted closer to Quinn. He grabbed her hand and put it over his heart. Finn did the same thing to his hand and her heart. By the time Quinn’s cries faded, the stillness of the room and each other’s heartbeats were the only things that could be heard. Finn lifted her head up with his index finger and looked into those eyes that he loved. “Can we be in love again?”
“I really thought you were the one for me when I was 16 years old…” she said in a soft whisper, slow tears rolling down her cheeks. ”And after we got back together again, I thought that would be it, and I was wrong. Again. And when we reunited now, I really, really thought that our love was forever…” she bit down on her lip. ”I’m not so sure about that anymore. I don’t-I don’t know what’s the right choice anymore.” Going to talk to Puck was the wrong idea. She was mad at him for only endorsing the fears that were already in her head.
Quinn peeled out of his arms, needing some air. She walked over to the window sill, looking out into the city, letting out a deep sigh. She really hoped that everything she was saying was the right choice. She loved Finn, but did she want to get her heart broken again? She tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, avoiding eye contact with him. Whatever she was saying would just make everything less painful in the end, she told herself.
“I thought you were the one for me too. Ever since sophomore year, I knew I’d spend the rest of my life with you…but then Drizzle happened. And I thought for sure that maybe Rachel would be the one…but then we broke up, and I got with Santana.” Even mentioning Santana’s name made Finn wonder why he ever dated her or told her that he loved her, when in reality, he didn’t. Not even close to what he felt for Quinn. “I guess what you need isn’t me, or an explanation. All you need is time. And if it’s time that you need, I’ll give you all the time in the world, Q.”
Finn watched the love of his life get off the bed and stare out of the window. He himself, laid down on the mattress to think about everything that he and she had said. Quinn was right about Rachel. He knew a part of him would always love her, but not in a way where it could transform into some sort of relationship that would function properly. It was Quinn. It’s always been Quinn. It’ll always be Quinn. Hudson, make things right with her now because sometimes, if you take too long, it’ll be too late. Finn told himself as he stared at the plain cream colored ceiling.
